AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!

Yep. That was the sound that could be heard for miles this morning. The sound coming from my bathroom when I got on the scale. My weight, in spite of being on track and actually getting going again on my exercise, WENT UP! Two pounds!!! I seriously almost died.

Do I understand? No. Am I frustrated? Yes. I had to take a long, hard look at what I did this week, and I am certain that my weight should be going down. However, I am equally certain that stress plays a major role in what our bodies do with calories and weight loss. And since my week was extraordinarily stressful - the last 7 days actually - I have to believe that my body is dealing with it by hanging on for dear life to whatever calories I put in there. I'm not sure of the dynamics in all of this, but I guess I have read about it and heard about it enough to know that its true.

I don't intend to throw in the towel when I am motivated the way I am today. Every day that I wake up motivated is a good day. And I will take advantage of ANY advantage that comes my way in this battle. I intend to win it.

Thought I would mention too that I got a GREAT inspirational email from my brother today. He lost 60 pounds and has kept it off for 4 years. I'm not going to pass on the whole thing, but I will tell you two of the gems he sent me way. First, exercise genuinely IS the key to weight loss. And second, "it's just a number." Both of these will get me looking great and concentrating how I feel instead of how the scale makes me feel. And it tells me I have to get busier, busier, busier at the gym or elsewhere to burn those calories and build that muscle.

Okay. There is it for today. It's nice to be back. I'm busy for a couple of days, but I'll be back sooner than later. Until then, I will pray for you, and you pray for me? Okie dokie? Peace.

Git R Done

I see that phrase all over the place, and as "inspirational" as it may be for some people, it kinda drives me crazy. Not even sure why . . .

So I have had a decent week. I am not down any weight, but getting back into the groove is pretty exhausting. Funny how the same battles that I so quickly overcame last January crop up like they are brand new! Like exercise. Hahaha. DON"T love it, but at the same time I DO love it. I hate watching what I eat, but at the same time I love it.

I am inspired every single time I make a good choice. And the little choices are often the largest. For example, today I took a Hershey's kiss out of the adorable little spider candy dish sitting on my living room table (I really wanted to slide that dish info in somewhere :)). I had every intention of popping it into my mouth, when I suddenly thought about it. I dropped it right back in the dish. It may seem like a small, small victory, but it's not. The more times I say no, the more I practice disciplining myself, the better I become in making the right choices. After a while, it will be back to being the way I live instead of some deprivation for reward game.

And here's another interesting tidbit for you. I know you all know I'm big into prayer. So today I was doing just that. And I came across a genuinely moving paragraph in one of my prayer books. Thomas a Kempis said (and I'm paraphrasing) that there's is no glory in a crown that isn't hard won. The glory of success can only come when we overcome a great measure of adversity to achieve it. Now I know I've spoken of my journey as a battle before. But it was kinda fun seeing my sentiments in someone else's book of prose.

So, I'm going to keep praying for the strength to overcome temptation and make these choices my DESIRES instead of something negative. I'll pray for the courage to win the battle of the buldge. lol. It'll come. God is good.

I'm off . . . off to battle. God bless!

Capture the Moment

That's what I've been trying to do. Capture the moment, or momentS rather, of last winter. I have gone over and over my strategy of weight loss over the last 10 months and I am left with nothing but a big question mark. Until now.

A comment from one of my readers from my August 31 post had a lot of interesting points. Some of them pretty hard hitting. This person encouraged me to go back and read between the lines from my earlier blogs. Look for the answers in what I have already said. Between that and the latest round of Biggest Loser episodes, I have tried to take an honest look at what is happening to me. And here's what I got:

Unless I set very specific, concrete goals for myself, I lose the "reason" for saying no to food that's unhealthy. I lose the motivation for getting myself to the gym. And I realize I cannot make generalizations like "I want to lose weight," or "I just CAN'T gain it back." There needs to be a purpose behind saying no. A concrete reason for making better choices. Otherwise I will give in every time. Every time.

I think it's interesting to note that when I was blogging almost every day I became accountable to people who read my blog. Real or imagined - there was accountability. So here we go. My goals, my purpose, my reason to say no.

1. My goal is to reach 150 by Valentine's Day. That's totally realistic for me. It's about two pound per week. . . or just over. I am 192 pounds - right on the nose. There's 19 1/2 weeks until Valentine's Day. Completely do-able.

2. I have 796 miles to Vegas. I'm walking or running there by Valentine's Weekend. I have decide if that's the weekend I'll fly there -- but it's looking like a great plan. :)

3. I have to blog 4 times per week. At least. It starts today. So keep checking back.

4. 1200 calories a day. 1200.

For now, I am going to keep enjoying my coffee. I tried to be done with it because I was trying to get rid of any and all "addictions" in my life -- the exception being hockey. Hee hee. But maybe I need to hang on to one for a while. Coffee isn't the worst thing I could do for myself.

Alright folks. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. I will see you tomorrow. I'm off to the metro area for meetings. Long car rides are boring but it's not an option. Day one starts today. In the meantime, I hope YOU have a good day. I hope everything goes your way. Peace to you and yours today.

HOLY COW!!!!

I cannot beLIEVE it has been that long since the last time I was here. Good gravy! It's time to get a grip people! This is simply ridiculous!

You already know I had the summer from hell. I mean, my prayer life is pretty decent, so that's holy. But the food . . . it was all down hill from July 1st on. The really unusual thing for me is WHY. Why can't I get the mentality that I had last winter? Why can't I stay on track? Why do I start every day with the best of intentions and end up with a jelly donut in my mouth by noon? (Okay well not a jelly donut. I don't even like those. But you get the point.) lol.

I have gained 13 pounds since July 1. This morning I was 190 pounds. BOOOOOOO!!! And of course I started out with the great intention of starting all over again. Today. Again today. And I have at least 50 pounds to get rid of. So let's talk numbers. If I lose at a rate of 2 pounds per week, I will lose 50 pounds in 25 weeks. When is that? The last week in April. Okay WOW! Seriously. HOLY COW!!! I gotta get this party started or it's never going to happen. So pray for me. Pray pray pray pray pray. I started okay today. Even got in a run - 2 miles, and then I walked one. But I have to stay with it. I got rid of my bigger clothes, so it's not an option. Tomorrow is a new day and I will keep you posted. And it won't be in six weeks. I promise. Nighty night.

P.S. to Willy: Thanks for the call about the lack of a blog entry. It gave me a little push. I'll be in touch! Hope I see you soon! I really, really miss you. :)